In Defense of the Introvert Student

I did well in school. I loved it. I miss it now. The learning, the interacting with new ideas and people. I had great teachers and got good grades. Lots of "Is a pleasure to have in class" and "Positive Influence on others" and so on.  But there was one comment that showed up periodically all throughout my education. I thought I was over it until I started to see it pop up on my kid's report cards, even my ridiculously intelligent and conscientious child's report card.

"Needs to participate more".

I hate that comment.

It may be appropriate to use on some kids report cards. Maybe. But let me defend those who, such as myself and now my introvert kids, have unfairly received it. Those of us who took school seriously and really generally gave it our best, most conscientious effort. If I could write a letter to those teachers it would go something like this.
 
Mrs./Mr. Teacher who used that comment on me,
You have taught hundreds, perhaps thousands of students in your career. God bless you. I loved your class! But I didn't understand the "needs to participate more" comment on my report card. You may have mistaken my silence for a lack of listening or interacting with your material. It was not that. I was in fact, constantly interacting with what you said or wrote. For the sake of argument, out of every hour you taught I may have missed 5 minutes of what you said while distracted by something another student did, but the other 95% was focused on your teaching. I was asking myself if I agreed with what you stated. Where you got that information. What I thought about it. What I would do with that new piece of info. I didn't raise my hand a lot. I needed time to process what you said. I found I did that best in a written assignment rather than a class discussion. But I wish you could have seen my mind or heard my conversations later with friends and family. My mind was busy processing, making connections to other ideas, and forming theories. Honestly, I'm probably one of the top listeners and "interacters" with your material who has ever sat in your class. Sometimes I tried to acquiesce, so I'd raise my hand and say something just so you couldn't put that comment on my next report card. I literally faked questions that I already knew the answer to just to meet your requirement. I wish you'd just valued the kind of learner that I was, and allowed the more verbal students to carry the class discussions. I wish you'd seen my lack of verbal participation as just part of my personality, as I've come to learn it just is. I never refused to answer if you called on me specifically, well unless it was 8th grade Geometry. That class made 0 sense to me. But I was always willing to answer, it just wasn't, and still isn't, in my nature to willingly volunteer my answers/opinions. But I'm generally happy to give them when asked. I'm also very happy to share when I do have a strong opinion that I've thought through. I love to share then! I'm just not a fan of sharing my half baked ideas in front of a group. I only do that with a select few. I value people's time and show that by only speaking when I have something useful or beneficial to say. Anyway, I hope you know how much I loved your class and deeply appreciate the time and effort you put in to educating students! And I hope you don't mistake quiet for a lack of participation again. Believe me when I say, we introverts are always listening and participating, just quietly.
Respectfully,
Rosalind Fuiten Gorc

So what do you think?

Yes, Yes, Yes !!!

Shhhh...

 I was scrolling through my facebook news feed the other night, when I came across a post and subsequent conversation that turned my stomach.  Fellow Christians were tearing into a local minister. The minister being ripped into was not from my church or even my denomination.  I too have disagreed with things he says.  But my thought was, "This is so pointless. What a waste of time and energy."  If you really dislike or disagree don't attend, don't give your money, and go somewhere else. It's not hard to find other options.  If you really love Jesus don't tear down those who are doing His work.  And seriously, it's the easiest thing in the world to find points of disagreement.   Impress me with your ability to find common ground.  We're on the same team, for Heaven's sake!   Yes really, for Heaven's sake.

So here's the thing, as the daughter, granddaughter, sister in law, friend and wife of pastors you will not hear me speak harshly about another minister, ministry leader, ministry or church.  Could I find things to criticize?  Sure.  But I will not do it because I am well acquainted with the pain when on the receiving end of it.   Were it not for the healing work of Jesus in me I would have curled up into a ball and thrown in the towel a long time ago.   Just don't do it, Christian people.   Ain't nobody got time for that and nothing life giving comes from it!   And furthermore, run away when others try to engage you in such talk.  Run.  Away.  And now I'm headed to the treadmill to run and talk to Jesus.   And I'm mad, so it wouldn't surprise me if I broke a speed record tonight. Silver linings, baby. 
 

Later...
 

I just ran my fastest mile ever, although it's still not very fast.   I'm really more of an endurance girl. Which, as it happens, is a great characteristic for ministry life!  Lemonade, anyone?  :)

 

 

Don't let sin remain hidden

I have this prayer that I pray regularly (thanks to a suggestion from my sister):
"Lord, don't let sin remain hidden.  Bring it to light so we can deal with it." 
I pray it over everything and everyone.  It's for myself, my family, our church and school, our city and all it's institutions, and up and up it goes.  I pray it for those who are defenseless or who don't have a loud voice; think children, the homeless, the elderly, and those with mental limitations.  I pray it over teachers and aides in schools; that they would overhear things they aren't supposed to hear!  I pray it over law enforcement; that they would have more than just their natural ability to uncover crime.  Yes, I'm praying they would have a crime fighting super power!  Crazy?  Maybe a little, but I'll let God sort it out.  And I pray it over the random citizen like the one in this story:

http://www.heraldnet.com/article/20130916/NEWS01/709169853/Lost-cellphone-leads-to-child-porn-arrest

Fuiten/Smith/Gorc Camping Trip 2013 - Wonders and Blunders.

 
 

 This, my friends, is a picture of preparation!  Even before we left for Lake Wenatchee State Park I made sure these precious items made it into my bag!  2011 was the year of the non-working, "natural" mosquito repellant, but we learned our lesson and went with full on deet this year!  And it worked. 

Join me on a little journey through what was the Fuiten/Smith/Gorc Camping Trip of 2013.  Our last was in 2011 and I can't say if there will be a next one.  I'm pretty sure I promised I wouldn't do it again unless we upgrade to a camper of some kind!

  

Here's Andy with my parents' Chihuahua, Brutus.
  Because 6 people, and a car full of everything we can't live without, just isn't enough crazy.
 



What is noteworthy in this picture you say?  Oh, just the fact that I camp with amazing people who bring things like fresh bouquets of flowers from their garden (mom) and the best coffee around, Rococo Coffee (my husband)!

This is what our set up looked like.  That's the Gorc family tent in the foreground, then our Honda Pilot, aka The Adventure Mobile, and mom and dad's trailer in the background.  The Smith tent is hiding behind the camper.  At 38 years of age I feel I have just about outgrown "tenting it"...The ground seems to get harder with each passing year...

Dad brought two of these puppies, recently purchased at Costco.  These were the chairs to sit in, nap in or eat in.  We all agreed these would work equally well in the family room.

Another awesome thing my mom brought.  Sun tea served from a pretty glass container while camping?  Yes, please!

 

And so began our first fishing adventure.  My dad and Craig spent ages setting up the fishing polls for all the little kids.  This is an act of love I tell you.

Bella looking all cute.  She caught two little perch that we threw back.  This was semi traumatic because one of them suffered life threatening injuries and proceeded to alternate between life and death in the water right in front of us.  There were cheers for each fluttering and prayers when it stilled. 

I'm related to almost all of these people.  We kind of took over the dock.
  My teenager, Grant, impressed me with his smooth casting skills.  Seriously, he looked like a pro.

Lucy caught the first fish of the trip, this lovely rainbow trout!  Jay and Ava said he tasted great!

Here we all are at the beginning of the Twin Peaks hike.  We referred to it as the MRE hike.  You will see why momentarily.

Just a man and his dog. 
We were all surprised by the hiking skills of Brutus.  He kept up better than some of our kids!

This is just my answer to all the feet pictures taken beside pools or white sand.  :) 

Here begins the lesson on MRE's (Meals Ready to Eat).  Dad got a good deal on Craigslist and brought enough for all of us to enjoy on our hike.

We each got a package which contained the whole delightful meal-from beverage to dessert.

It said they were "easy open" seals.  But really, are they ever?

Jazzy enjoying apple jelly on crackers!

This is my ravioli tortellini thing.  It was warm because we used the special warming bags that contain chemicals to which you simply add water.  (I used the creek water to feel a little more like a survivalist.)   It tasted remarkably similar to a can of ravioli.  The applesauce was my favorite though!

And how cute are these patriotic shortbread cookies?!

Lucy, sporting her Duck Dynasty shirt, on the trail.

We also went on several "nature drives".  These are a favorite of mine.  We took the walkie talkies so all 3 cars could communicate.  I was offering $3 for a bear sighting.  I still have my $3.

This picture makes me laugh.  It looks like I'm all peaceful, but I so wasn't!  To my left is a breathtaking waterfall and of course the kids wanted to get close to the edge to peer over it!  I will not apologize for the way I yelled at my kids at this site.  I was trying to save their fearless little lives!  I'm breaking out in hives just reliving this memory.  Moving on... 

Ah, yes.  It's out of chronological order, but it's perfect!  Just ahhhh...

This is my rear.  Just heed this advice. Ok!?!

At the site of our MRE luncheon.

A boy, studying a map, with a dog in his shirt.
  He was tracking the Eagle fire near Leavenworth, about 13 miles from us.   

Things got rather smoky at Lake Wenatchee.

Our redneck husbands.

Andy got to go fishing a second time after repeatedly telling us the fish were "calling his name".  He was right. 
Did he have time to look up and give me a good smile for the pic?  No. 

He headed for the cooler and exchanged the fish for a root beer.  Once refreshed, he shared his fish tale with us.

Lots of kids got hurt.  They were falling off bikes and scooters at alarming rates.  They received excellent medical care in the grandparents' trailer.  Here's Bella with her dad and Grandpa.  Grandpa is using his nifty garage sale first aid kit. 

We did a lot of this.  Which, can I just say, is not as awesome without a campfire!  A full on campfire ban was in force, but Jay and dad improvised with a coke can, bacon grease and a paper towel wick.  It gave us a flame to stare into.

We tried to conserve cups by placing our names on them, and then people took it to the next level (Grant).

Ahhh...more Andy fishing...but really, in the moment it was not this relaxing.  I was dodging hooks and worms, and hanging onto his shirt with a death grip when he ventured too close to the edge!  And there were 6 kids fishing.  And for a while it was just mom and I.  And they all needed help with the worms, and I don't do worms!  So I handled the marshmallows and my far braver mother handled the worms.  Yuck! 

Then Bella got her birthday wish-Horseback riding!

So we all got Bella's birthday wish!  It was great fun and a beautiful ride.  And I'm still sore.

In conclusion, the Fuiten/Smith/Gorc Camping Trip of 2013 was a rousing success!  I say that with a certain assurance that can only come once one is home, and showered, and shaved, with the laundry done and the car cleaned out.  :)
  I sure do love my little family and all our little adventures too!

And Sometimes He Speaks Hilariously Clearly

  Every now and then I go through one of those introspective, questioning periods.  I've been in one the last few days.  During these "events" I ask the Lord, "Am I doing what you've called me to do?", "Is this where you want me?".
  These events rarely, if ever, develop out of a period of great contentment, but are usually preceded by some kind of difficulty.  So my questions can sometimes take an edge.  Such as, "Is this seriously what you created me for?" or "Did I miss something, because surely this isn't it, right?". 
  Some of this came to the surface during our romantic Italian dinner date last night.  Craig and I realized we were in complete disagreement on a certain topic related to one of my previously stated questions, he wanting to continue and me wanting to change, and in conclusion I said, "Well, let's not worry about the fact that we disagree since a decision doesn't need to be made now."  And in my mind I was, somewhat ungraciously, thinking, "God will change one of our hearts and I'm pretty sure it will be yours!"
  So I was still in one of those restless moods this morning, and I was perusing real estate in rural places.  You know, where there's no traffic, and you can get a lot of land and house for your money, because I was thinking, "Surely I was not made to live here!"  And I was reading news articles, all the while trying to escape the questioning, niggling thoughts running through the back of my mind.
  And after a couple hours of spinning my wheels I heard that quiet voice.  It came direct and straight through the clutter of my restless mind, "Go to my word."  So I left Twitter land and clicked over to my Bible app and hadn't even opened to a specific book when the verse of the day jumped out at me, from The Message version,  Colossians 2:6-7 "My counsel for you is simple and straightforward: Just go ahead with what you've been given.  (I read this as Craig's "continue", not Roz's "change".  No need to make some big change when I've already given you the thing I want you to do.)  You received Christ Jesus, the Master; now live him.  You're deeply rooted in him.  You're well constructed upon him.  You know your way around the faith.  Now do what you've been taught.  School's out; quit studying the subject and start living it!  And let your living spill over into thanksgiving."
  And I just laughed, and a tear or two may have escaped, because his word was so direct to my discontented heart.  No beating around some bush.  No room for misinterpretation.  Just direct.  Not unkind.  Just straightforward, life giving direction.  And if I'm where he wants me, then I can be content because I trust his heart for me. 
  Then, because I've been taught well to properly read scripture in context, I read all of the 1st and 2nd chapters, in several versions, and I considered the original audience too.  And what did I find there?  Oh, just a couple more nuggets of truth that spoke directly to topics that I'd been pondering and turning over in my mind recently.
  He's just so good to me.  So patient.  So willing to gently guide me.  Repeatedly!  And he wants to do it for you too. 

 

Well That Wasn't Awkward

This happened while I made that wonderful fresh egg breakfast:

Why yes, Mr. P.S.E Man, we can chat now. 

(Great job pretending not to notice my pajamas, unbrushed teeth, crazy bed hair and lack of makeup.  I've just been busy making breakfast, keeping kids alive, doing laundry and updating my facebook.)

How much money did you say we owe you?  Name your price 'cause I'd pay any amount to get you to leave now!

So he did.  And I've never written a check faster! 

Fresh!

This morning's breakfast: from chicken to the table in under an hour.  Fresh!!

 

 

Homemade is Not Always Better!

I was all proud that I made my own pizza dough last night.  Yay, right!?! 

First bite and Bella says, "Mom, did you make this dough right?", Andy says, "Is this pizza?" and Lucy says, "Well, it's kind of exotic."  Then dad walks in a little late and the kids all yell, "Dad, try mom's pizza!" 

Craig still made them thank me for dinner.  Ha!

In conclusion, homemade is not always better.  And curiously, I see that store bought dough has miraculously appeared in my fridge today!